Not complicated here, just direct and to the point. What do you believe as far as
someone being gay? For a male that has always had feminine ways since a young
child, what are your thoughts on one being BORN THAT WAY? I was taught that you
are not BORN that way because God would never do that or allow that. This is a 14
year old that says that they are just not attracted to girls. The Bible says that
NO HOMOSEXUALS WILL ENTER INTO HEAVEN (along with other sins). THAT is what the
Bible says , so how would you get around that?
This 14 year old is my
grandson and this is causing MUCH problems!!
Thank you!
Hi,
thanks for the email and I can imagine your heartache. It seems that
parents (and grand-parents) face so many new challenges these days that were
hardly thought of a generation ago. Our youth are struggling under all sorts of
confusion (an increasing percentage no longer even know what gender they are!)
and it is very difficult for kids to navigate safely through this difficult age.
In
terms of your questions, the Bible is clear, in both Old and New Testaments, that
homosexuality is a sin (ie Genesis 19:1–13; Leviticus 18:22; 20:13; Romans
1:26–27; 1 Corinthians 6:9; Jude 1:7). Whether one is born that way is a
complicated issue. I'm far from an expert but I'll state where I stand.
I don't believe there is a 'gay-gene' as such (which the LGBT
movement is desperate to prove.) But hormones and chemicals in our bodies are
affected by our environment and by what we (or our mothers while pregnant) take
and we certainly live in an age with more drugs and chemicals/pesticides etc than
ever before. This leads to all sorts of health issues that previous generations
haven't known.
The following page is useful of whether someone is
born gay. https://www.gotquestions.org/born-gay.html
In part it speaks from a medical point of view of the many factors that can
influence sexuality. It says:
"Most researchers have concluded
that sexual orientation is a complex, multifactorial issue in which biological,
social and psychological factors combine to play a role in the ultimate sexual
orientation of an individual. According to Julie Harren, Ph.D., the formula for
this interplay between factors might be represented by these equations:
--Genes
+ Brain Wiring + Prenatal Hormonal Environment = Temperament.
--Parents +
Peers + Experiences = Environment.
--Temperament + Environment = Homosexual
Orientation."
In terms 'No homosexuals will enter into
heaven' it is not homosexuality that keeps a person out of Heaven.
Homosexuality is a sin but we are all sinners by nature. That will come out in
different ways due to our upbringing and temperament but we all sin. Pride is
enough to keep someone out of heaven. So is gossip. The list of acts that exclude
one from Heaven (which includes homosexuality) also includes idolaters, greedy
and slanderers. (1 Cor 6:9-10). Other lists include the cowardly and liars (Rev
21:8) The point is this - not one of us are worthy of Heaven. All of us require
God's grace and salvation. So the one sin that prevents a person from
entering Heaven is the failure to believe in the work of the Lord Jesus and
accept His offer of salvation.
Now look at what it says about those in
Corinth:
1Co 6:9-11 Do you not know that the wicked will not inherit
the kingdom of God? Do not be deceived: Neither the sexually immoral nor
idolaters nor adulterers nor male prostitutes nor homosexual offenders (10) nor
thieves nor the greedy nor drunkards nor slanderers nor swindlers will inherit
the kingdom of God. (11) And that is what some of you were. But you were
washed, you were sanctified, you were justified in the name of the Lord Jesus
Christ and by the Spirit of our God.
It says that is what
some of you were. The fact that the washing, sanctification and justification are
all in the past tense (ie you 'were' washed) is a pointer to their
salvation and that their position and identity before God is no longer as a
'thief' or an 'adulterer' or a 'homosexual' or a
'slanderer'... their identity because of the salvation of God is as one
justified, righteous before God, a child of God. Now does that mean that the
saved one will not have any issues with their particular weakness and sin
anymore? It might. Sometimes God's salvation brings instant deliverance in
an area. Other times the temptation remains. But temptation is not sin (even
Jesus was tempted), it is the act that is. And when a believer does sin they
confess it. We have an advocate in the Lord Jesus. (1 John 2:1-2) The wonder of
the gospel is that a true born again believer has had ALL their sins forgiven and
are PERFECT in the sight of God (Heb 10:1,14,18).
I know it must be
very difficult seeing the struggles and confusion of your grandchild. You
didn't say whether he believes in the Lord Jesus or not. I don't know
what his attitude towards homosexuality is. It is also worth bearing in mind that
he is still only 14 and the body has a lot of changes still to go through. But,
as you believe he has had feminine traits for some time, your job is to treat him
as Jesus would. Jesus was able to show both grace and truth (John 1:17, 8:11).
Not always easy to find the right balance but your task is to do the same... and
PRAY! In the end it is the power of God through prayer that changes hearts. God
loves your grandchild very much. Jesus didn't come to judge but to save
(John 3:17). And He is still in the business of saving, changing people and
turning their lives around.
May God bless your grandson and give you
the wisdom and grace in helping and supporting him through this time.